Chasing Perfect

Openings

Each time we collide,
when my purpose
meets your drive,
your face cracks like a
windshield on impact
to reveal that
imperfect smile.

There is so much
beauty to be found
in the brokenness
of your expressions;
gaps kept big enough
for a small dreamer
to always fall into.
©Assumpta Ozua 2015

 When I was growing up, one of my (many) nicknames was Lisa Simpson – no, not because I was yellow and had spiky hair. More so because I was a precocious know-it-all with a penchant for perfectionism – hindsight is a wonderful thing. However, unlike Lisa, I was pretty good at sports and academics, plus other kids actually liked me (I think?) and I took pride in this.

Waiting for the end of each term (semester) to know how many A’s I’d gotten was an exciting time for me. I respected my elders, did what I was told and lived to please people – particularly my parents. I thought I enjoyed this. I was wrong.

In fact, for a long time I did revel in that lifestyle but it wasn’t isn’t sustainable. Chasing perfection is exhausting. Its very existence is a myth.

Over the years I have discovered that the happiest people aren’t necessarily the ones who look faultless or have flawless lives: it’s often an impeccable façade. The cheeriest and most contented people I have met are in fact the people who give themselves grace. They are aware of their shortcomings but chose to highlight and celebrate their strengths instead.

These are the people who chase purpose, not perfection and are all the better for it. After watching a video on my friends Facebook wall called Chasing Perfect, I am reminded of how far I have come.

I am not where I want to be yet and that’s ok. I am on my way and I am choosing to enjoy my imperfect journey. I am choosing to be present in my present rather than stressing myself out and striving for a future that isn’t set in stone.

Note: let me be clear, this does not mean that  I won’t work hard – I will! I’m just giving myself more grace.

Today and every day hereafter, I choose purpose over perfect.

I hope you do too.