“Don’t assume, ask. Be kind. Tell the truth. Don’t say anything you can’t stand behind fully. Have integrity. Tell people how you feel.”
For a very long time – the majority of my life actually, I didn’t speak my mind. Mostly because I didn’t want to upset or anger anyone, nor did I want people to think less of me or dislike me due to my differing / alternative / frank opinions.
I try my best now to speak my truth but admittedly this is something I struggle with because 1) I don’t want to deal with the repercussions and 2) people claim to want honesty but they get upset when it’s given to them (I have been guilty of this).
The truth is, very few people like to hear anything [percieved as] negative criticism. However, constructive criticism can lead to growth and spending your life tight lipped and surpressed can brew a tidal wave of emotion, destined to drown your nearest and dearest when your fascade cracks and you finally have enough.
I’m trying to avoid irreparably damaging the relationships I care about by being honest about my feelings towards certain situations and more importantly my life choices. These discussions have proved enlightening and very freeing.
I’m not quite at the stage where I can tell anyone and everyone how I think or what I feel. Quite frankly I think that level of honesty and intimacy is reserved for a special few. But, if you’re anything like me… or rather, if you’re anything like my younger self, the very act of finally speaking up – even if only to a few people, is an achievement in itself.
So, speak your truth and be yourself – everyone else is already take afterall. Those who have a problem with it (provided you aren’t being malicious or irrational) usually don’t matter and if they are important in your life, respect their stance and move on amicably.